We were always allowed an ice cream or a drink when we were younger and out and about. We knew the boundaries, we knew what a treat was and we didn’t push it (although no doubt asked for both already knowing the answer!). We sometimes got a pencil in the gift shop or perhaps one of those little bouncy ball things (that would be my sister) but never much more. I wasn’t a deprived child I had a nice upbringing in a lovely home, with foreign holidays and all the toys and clothes I needed, but it just feels a bit different now!
Today in general things seem different and I’m not sure in my own mind if this is a result of the world simply being different. With such a disposable culture nowadays you can literally buy anything for a small amount of money. Perhaps it’s because we are fortunate to earn more than our parents, or because we are making up for being at work. Perhaps it is just because it’s nice to buy treats!
Anyway this week I purchased yet more Lego for one small boy who is obsessed. He plays for hours with the stuff, his imagination is endless, and it’s lovely building things with him. He completed a whole week with no accidents of the toilet variety during the day and amazingly he is now 5 days into being dry at night. He has also had his hair cut. Now the hair cut has been a hideous event for us for the last 18 months, he hates it and because of this we all end up nearly in tears and covered in hair every time it’s attempted. He has a huge mop of thick hair and he gets very hot! So we need to cut the curls for more reasons than because it looks smart.
This week we talked about it lots and he finally allowed my sister to cut it with scissors (not clippers), it was a momentous occasion. She is a hairdresser so this isn’t so random as it could be but she is a colourist, she did however make an exception for her nephew and got the scissors out! He hates loud noises (random as he is very loud!) with fireworks and a hand dryer being high on the list of hates. Clippers apparently are also featuring as evil hence the scissors request!
So because everyone knows bribery is the official way the good parenting guides suggests to get toddlers to do things….I used Lego as the bribe. And to great success I must add.
On their own these things we buy seem small and the joy he gets is great. But is there now an expectation and are we creating a rod for our own back?
I am pretty sure he’s spoilt, trips out for lunch, getting character t shirts and new Lego probably seem normal to him. But this seems to be the case for a large number of today’s children. I’m not sure why I’m bothered, if we can give him these things why not, but at the same time if it’s not how you have been bought up it feels very strange. A bit like when you are a grown up and all of a sudden you realise you can buy sweets when you want and not just on a Friday!
Now these are probably just the ramblings of a crazy woman and I’m sure big piggle will continue to receive everything he could ever want….but it has made me think.
two little piggles 
I often wonder about this with our two. We don’t tend to buy them all that much in the way of toys, in fact they mostly just get toys and birthdays and christmas (I know – I feel a bit like stingy even typing that!) But they get ruined with days out. We worked out during the half term that we had taken them to the seaside three times (we live about 70 miles from the nearest coast), two different farms, on play dates and to a soft play. All in the space of a week? My three year old now wakes up and says “Where we go today?” like it’s just an expectation. I love taking them out and about but I do wonder if we might not be doing ours any favours, but then like you – we’re just trying to give them great memories.
Thanks for linking with #fartglitter x
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I know it’s a tough one! You can only make memories once so I guess we shouldn’t give ourselves too much of a hard time!
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I know what you mean. Archie is obsessed with Hot Wheels cars and they’re only £1 at our local supermarket so we often get him one as a treat but he now expects one every time we go and we struggle whether to get him one or not. On one hand, it’s a nice treat and not very expensive but I do wonder whether he’s spoiled or not! Thanks for linking up to #MarvMondays. Kaye xo
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Ah the supermarket….the magazines are a killer I have a tantrum every time but at least with a car you know he will play with it! I guess if we are considering if they are spoilt or not it at leasts demonstrates awareness and we can then manage those tantrums as we wish! Thanks for the comment xx
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Yep I totally understand. I use the same form of bribery and my little girl gets big toys outside of the norm of Christmas and birthdays. I always wonder if it’s a good thing to do this and yet I still always end up at the counter forking over my debit card #bloggerclubuk
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Yep i know those debit card days well! Thanks for reading x
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We have the same problem with haircuts, the sreaming, the hair everywhere, but bribery doesn’t seem to work with my little man, yet anyway! We’re getting to the point though where he’ll see something in a toy shop and want it but luckily if I sneak it away from him he forgets, god knows how I’ll be when that all comes to an end! x #MarvMondays
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Good luck with the hair cuts at the age of three this is our first success in 18 months! X
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I think there’s a difference between treating a child and spoiling one. If you can afford it, why not give them it if it makes you both happy. I think when it becomes a problem is if you do say no and the child can’t or won’t accept that
Thanks for linking up to #BloggerClubUK 🙂
Debbie
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I agree, I can definitely see a huge difference between my kids and me. Treats are much more frequent than when I was small. Food for thought that is for sure x #FartGlitter
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